No, I'm not talking of Viagra.
But come to think of it, maybe you're not that far far off. You see, every self-help story has its secret of success nugget. Yes the magic words, the secret discovery that brings it all together. One common cardinal ingredient to every one of them every time is, and will always be, passion.
Successful business people know it, high flyer entrepreneurs preach it, mentors will tell you, youought to follow your passion, politician leaders show it, activists, sports men and musicians will tell you the same. Hell yeah, just about everyone with a plume to his name or feather to his cap … or not, has something to say about it. After all as Jon Bon Jovi said "Nothing is as important as passion.
This is attested to differently in one paraphrased word or another by notables and legends like Nelson Mandela, Steve Jobs, Oprah Winfrey, Richard Branson and wait for it, no less than the great Albert Einstein himself. Yes Passion. "No matter what you want to do with your life, be passionate". That same nugget remains true for sex.
As someone once said, "Sex without the sizzle is like lemonade without the pop, it quenches your thirst, but leaves you feeling flat!" Another anonymous quote has it that "Practice can make perfect, but it's passion that persuades." Yes wherever in the boardroom, law chamber or office, the ability to make your audience feel your energy is powerful and effective. We as humans tend to instinctively react and bond with people who either have a burning sincere desire for us or our cause. But first, how did we get here.
I was discussing with a girl friend of mine recently, and the topic swung round to sex. One thing led to another and before I knew it, I was chipping in tidbits of what I had gleaned from a book I had recently read. Needless to say, that although she explained of some of the books injunctions about how a man can become the dominant partner in a relationship, since I did observe some of these things in her own relationship and she had never before complained to me about it, I quietly let her carry the point.
Anyhow, when it did come down to being passionate about what made great sex and great lovers, she was all fours in agreement with the assessment made by HalfBreed in his book that;
"Passion is what separates mediocre lovers from great ones. Women crave passion. They want to be swept away their feet, taken charge of, and (made love) to like animals. highly focused on the present moment, combined with forceful, aggressive sexual action. "
So there it is, contrary to popular culture and what many of us guys have been led to believe while we were growing up, being a gentleman will only get you so far. Most women like and will generally submit to the assertive type of man.
The problem is that while some men take it too far others generally err in the opposite directions. And where it may be okay to be gentlemanly in some situations, when it comes to matters of the heart and sex, the male must be aggressive. Perhaps the ideal feint would be that of a Mr. nice guy with an edge but a positive beast in bed. This can be exhibited by taking initiative to pull your partner into new maneuvers as you have her helpless in bed.
It is better to do this after you have successfully been able to make her climax, at which stage she will be putty in your hands and more receptive to your commands. How to do this. If you are still working on your stamina, you can ericit longer forays into foreplay. Massage and suck her clitoris. Rub her G-spot, stroke her inner thighs and gently squeeze her breasts so that it oozes slowly out of your cupped hands like butter.
Make her wait, even if by now she's positively begging for your penis. For women, knowing they are about to have sex is almost as good as the sex itself. Once you have brought her to the edge of ecstasy without actually climaxing, you can proceed. As you build up your stamina and technique, you can cut down on foreplay time, more and more until finally you have mastered your art and can choose to allocate whatever time-short or long, you wish to it. All this without it negatively affecting your performance.
In addition talking dirty, choking, slapping her buttocks in the heat of sex, and eye contact can in some women be a real turn on. Remember your aim is passion and mastery. Your woman will respond to you with the same measure of force with which you invest her. And if she really loves you, believe me the reward here will be mutual ecstasy. As it's said, to every action there is an equal and opposite reaction. Your aim should be to create this sort of reaction in her:
"Your passion for me drives me to places I thought only dreams could come from." and "Inhaling your breath into my body, taking you into my soul, all this, through a kiss." Of course the difference here is that you will not berely be kissing her. No, you'll be dishing it out like there was no tomorrow.
Finally you should make sure that she reaches orgasm. To do otherwise would defeat the whole point of the exercise and in fact prove counterproductive. To make you last longer so that she can get it off before you do, you can adopt the cow-girl position instead of the missionary one.
This means that facing you, she sits atop in your pelvic area with your penis inserted in her. Now despite this flips the male on female sex dominance mantra on its head, it will help you achieve your aim of helping her climax and when she does or is about to, you can reverse your positions so that you end up back on top. Ideally you should go for round two.
Each time, by ensuring that she climaxes, you ensure that when it's all over, you leave her eagerly thinking of you days later and ready to respond to your call at the drop of a hat. Why? Because she knows how good she will get it when next you meet.